I Don't Do It Alone

Last night I had a moment of frustration. The laundry was done but we'd never actually gotten to the point of putting it away, the dog made a "mistake" in the carpet and the cat was having a great time terrorizing the dog. I had homework piled on top of my desk and halfway up the wall, and Jeremy and I were both just mentally and physically exhausted.

The homework thing had really gotten to me. At times I feel as if all the chaos in my house would not be there if I had not gone to graduate school. I needed to vent so before collapsing from exhaustion in my bed as Jeremy set up the weather radio, this is the conversation that happened with a friend that's out of town:

Me: I can't wait to see something other than this pavement jungle. I gotta get outta here. 

BFF: Yea no doubt lol

Me: I just need a break

BFF: I know it, you've been kicking all kinds of butt lately. 

Me: Well it comes with a price, a hard one. I'm tired. I feel like I having been showing much attention to my loved ones lately, the housework is lacking, my thoughts are scattered and Jeremy's bored. 

BFF: It's all going to be worth it, you know that, right? 

Me: I know... but nothing is really more important to me than a happy home and a happy husband. 

BFF: I know.. and what I also know is you being as successful as  you are and can be and will be makes him happy. He's proud of you.. we both are. 

Me: I know.. but I have equal pride in you guys and I fail to show it. 

BFF: Fail? Who said you do that? 

Me: I just don't feel like I show you guys how much I appreciate you. It's the little things, ya know? It means the world to me that Jeremy reminds me to eat breakfast (mornings are hectic, I often forget causing my hypoglycemia to kick into overdrive) and buys me Cadbury Cream eggs to surprise me. It warmed my heart when I fell asleep today and you reminded me to take my glasses off so they wouldn't break.  I love it when I cook and you and Hubbers fight over what's left. This is my own little family, you see? And I'd do anything I can for it. 

BFF: I know you would.. and we would do the same. You may not think you show appreciation but he sees it, I see it. You cook dinner after work, help him clean house after 10+ hours at school. It adds up. You're a great student, amazing wife, and the best friend/sister I could ask for. 

Me: Thank you ;) but I couldn't do it without help. 

BFF: Sure you could, you just don't have to :)

Do you see why I bust my butt so hard? My husband, my family, my friends.. they all support me like this. They. Are. Amazing. But I feel like I need to clear up a little detail.

I'm not a maid, nor am I treated like one. I clean house and cook for my husband because I want to. If I didn't, he'd do it, and he has when I failed. But I feel like my purpose as HIS wife, not just a wife, but HIS wife, is to do what I can everyday to show him how much I appreciate his hard work and how insanely in love I am with him. I'm not held with chains to the stove everyday. Jeremy and I actually split the chores.

Gallup did an interesting article on how spouses share the workload. You should check it out! You may find that it's not as black and white as most would think. It would make you see that the old fashioned wife and husband scenario is still the same.... and completely different at the same time.

If I cook, he washes dishes. If I sweep, he vacuums. If I walk the dog, he cleans the litter box. I clean the tubs, he does the counters. WE. SPLIT. EVERYTHING.

I couldn't be a super spouse without my super spouse! We meet in the middle and it makes us a team of Super Spouses.

Now I've given you a very deep look into my home life. What do you think? How do you share the chores? Do you ever get asked about how you feel regarding being the homemaker? Leave a comment below and we'll discuss it.

Be powerful, be precious, be patient.

Love as always,
Courtney